An expert explains how to make good use of "couple counseling" (Cosmopolitan)

No matter how happy they look, there are always problems between couples. In such cases, “couple counseling”, which is often seen in overseas dramas, can be a solution. [Photo] Advice for marriage, learning from the causes of divorce So, we interviewed Ms. Yumi Yoshioka, a counselor specializing in adolescence, couples, and families, about how to effectively use "couple counseling." We asked about "Couples Counseling", which is not well known in Japan, such as what kind of situation you should go to, what you should do to get your partner to go with you. Supervision: Adolescent, couple, family counselor Yumi Yoshioka Adolescent counselor, couple family psychology counselor, education training lecturer As a home education class lecturer, he has been involved with more than 20,000 parents and children, couples, and various families. Marriage Counseling Association Primarital Counselor, General Incorporated Association Asia Junior Golf Association Mental School presided over and supporter.

What is couple counseling?

According to Mr. Yoshioka, couple counseling is something you do to get out of the "world of beliefs" that you have closed off together. “When you are dating or living together, at first you will feel like ‘we are alike’ or ‘we are one and the same!’ and have a good time. So, as the relationship deepens, the boundaries of the private zone fade, and trivial troubles such as 'something is wrong' or 'I want you to stop this anymore' start to occur." Couples counseling helps when such problems and ambiguities arise, not just between the two of you, but by saying, 'Let's try to open up a little bit.'"

Beneficial Timing for Counseling

Rosie, the author of this article, was also one of the couples counselors. The reason for her is that she hurt the boyfriend she is dating in an incident a few years ago. He forgave me at the time, but recently he had flashbacks of his bad feelings. I tried to convey my feelings for him in various ways, but I couldn't open my heart with my own strength. However, we both wanted to be partners in life together in the future, so we decided to go to couple counseling. However, we weren't able to solve our problems in just one session, and considering the future costs, he gave up, and even now, our relationship remains unrepaired. My boyfriend and I went to couples counseling when we had no other choice, but should we really have gone sooner? According to Mr. Yoshioka, most of the people who come to the consultation are in a situation where their problems are piling up and there is nothing they can do about it. However, in reality, it is good to receive counseling when even trivial things get stuck in your mind, or when you feel like you are always feeling uneasy about the same thing.

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